The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “June 26, 2011”

“You Can Do Better”

Remember this post of video of the two girls commenting on the online dating profiles of men? It is disturbing and unpleasant but every red-pill man who is single needs to revisit that video on a regular basis.

A woman recently responded to a message I had sent her on plenty on PoF. Her response was quite enthusiastic. There is more here.

We had a brief chat on the phone to set up an ice cream date. In the course of the phone conversation she revealed that she and her friends often went through online dating profiles and the messages that she received from guys like me.

Suddenly, it occurred to me. Online dating for women can be a social experience. The woman with the profile invites her coterie of friends over and they all go through the incoming messages and review profiles together. It’s a gab-fest, laugh-fest, bitch-fest complete with drinks and appetizers.

Consider the feminine social dynamic of such an event – call it the “profile review session” – and the thought of a group of slightly drunk and likely bitter group of women. One woman is looking for love, sex, excitement, whatever and the Greek chorus is right there with her with this constant refrain:

“You can do better.”

Another profile pops up. Laughter ensues. By the way guys, this is your profile they are all laughing at. Again, the four words.

“You can do better.”

This happens over and over and over. It’s negative reinforcement on an 80 proof scale. With a group of women all finding reasons to reject a profile, then no profile is approved.

(Basic rule about woman and dating applies here – before she’s intimate with a man, she’s looking for reasons to reject him.)

Then the escalation occurs.

“You deserve better.”

Such a wretched, miserable word, “deserve”. It’s the word that infects dating and courtship like flesh-eating bacteria. Yet the word is tossed around more than a hacky-sack at a Phish concert (hey, I’m old, sue me).

The women continue on, the alcohol having its affect. The man-bashing commences with earnest and their attention is diverted to something more meaningful, like those awesome cupcakes in the kitchen. This is where the diet rationalization hamster gets to spinning its wheel with vigor.

What the boozy broads haven’t realized is that they’ve run out of profiles. Every man was rejected, every… single… one. As the cupcakes are consumed a general consensus is reached. Being single, fat, and unhappy is somehow empowering.

Advice for women doing the online dating thing: Don’t invite your friends over while you review messages and profiles.

Dalrock has some similar commentary on this issue, here.

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