From Merriam-Webster: “not readily investigated, interpreted, or understood : mysterious”
A man should not be an open book. When building comfort with a woman, too many men reveal too much, too quickly. The dating process is about the nice process of learning about someone. When a man puts all his cards on the table too soon, he runs the risk of excess comfort and finding himself in the FriendZone™ or revealing information that a woman finds off-putting enough for her to bail out early.
It is certainly possible to be Charismatic without revealing too much. In fact, if the Charisma is opaque, it’s even more enticing to a woman because it’s easier to build attraction. She will be very keen to learn more. Of course, if she’s got some serious feminine charm (a rare thing today) she’s also working on being inscrutable.
Being inscrutable is not just about verbally revealing too much. It’s also about big body gestures and exaggerated facial expressions. Save those for drama class. An inscrutable man is a man in control of his reactions. A wry smile can be far more effective than a broad smile in the attraction game. This also has the added benefit of making a man look confident and in control. The old cliché of “still waters run deep” certainly applies to the masculine character.
Yes, this advice goes against the “be yourself” mantra stressed by mothers, sisters, and close female friends. But if “being yourself” is not getting a man’s relationship goals met and leaving him miserable, it’s time to adapt and change. It’s difficult because the post-divorce man has decades of behavioral habits ingrained. Fortunately, humans are remarkably adaptable and only a lazy man would refuse to be adaptable.