I created a fake profile on Plenty of Fish. The persona is “Marcus”, a 53 year old doctor who is 6’2″ tall. He’s divorced, his kids are grown up, he has a dog, and he’s looking for a long term relationship. I found a very good photo of an attractive middle-aged guy.
The full profile can be found here.
For the profile text, I put in this:
The biggest challenge is for women to re-adjust their approach to men. Women usually look for reasons to reject a man. They find the bad things first. This results in a lot of frustrated single women. To start the readjustment, I have this very simple mental exercise:
Every time you see and/or interact with a man, look for something good about him. This includes online dating profiles.
It can be something small.
It can be something big.
It has to be something.
Perhaps you see a sweaty landscaper with stained clothes working hard at his job. What’s good about him? He’s working hard. That’s a very good thing.
Maybe you have a male colleague who is not the most attractive of physical specimens. But you notice that he has a very nice voice and speaks very thoughtfully. Those are two good things.
You meet a man socially who has a very weak chin and terrible fashion sense. Yet you see that he has beautiful eyes, broad shoulders, and a great sense of humor. Wow, three good things!
You see an online dating profile with bad photos. The words, however, are well put together and are quite appealing. Good things, indeed.
This doesn’t mean changing your standards regarding the men you date. It only means noticing the positive elements in men. That’s the exercise. Simple, no?
Do this for a week. After the week passes, ask yourself this question: “Where are all the good men?”
Guess what, you just spent a week seeing them with your own eyes.
Does that sound familiar? It’s from one of my recent blog posts.
Within 15 minutes of creating that profile, it’s received three messages. Wow.
Update (a couple of hours later):
The profile is getting lots of traffic. Many women don’t even bother to read the profile, they just look at the ONE photo and send messages, favorite the profile, initiate chat, “meet me”, etc. I just want them to read the words. I might have to kill the profile.
Update, Day 2
I don’t know if I should laugh or cry. The profile has gotten dozens of views and messages. The vast majority of women have “Hi” as their subject line when sending a message. I suspect that fewer than 20% actually read the profile. Quite a few women are those who I messaged with my real profile and who then gave the real me the “read, deleted” treatment.
The profile now has 47 incoming messages. Amazing.
Update Day 2, evening…
The profile is getting more traffic… up to 60 incoming messages, maybe more. And many women want to chat with me.
Update Day 3, morning…
Marcus is a real hit with the ladies. Some of the incoming emails clearly show that many of these women are not reading the profile. One woman even accused me of being bitter. I guess my advice hit close to home with her and so she lashed out. Oh well.
In the weirdest twist, Nebraska lady (she friend-zoned me) messaged the fake profile with a long description of her actual dates with me, the real life Private Man, and how I screwed up.
Update Day 3, evening
150 incoming communications and counting. I haven’t bothered to read all the messages because they are all basically the same. I also realized that I put $150K+ (annually) for an income level. This changes the auto-match algorithms that PoF uses, hence the the matches I have not seen with my real profile.