The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “August 17, 2015”

A Woman’s Red Pill Online Dating Profile

This woman’s online dating profile is real. She and I have corresponded in the past and she recently sent me a link to her blog where she copied her profile. Here it is in all its amazing glory. In a subsequent email, she has indicated that this profile is indeed on a real online dating website, Plenty of Fish. Do note that I’ve blogged about her previously.

It’s very clear that this woman reads Red Pill attraction and dating blogs and has incorporated that advice into her online dating profile. As for the response, she indicated the numbers which are found below the quoted profile along with some additional comments from me. Note: I’ve added a few comments to her profile in [brackets].

1. Do you like to eat? If you do, I like to cook, and I like to cook what you like to eat, not what I think you should eat. I’ll even cook fish, even though I don’t (nor ever have) eaten seafood. Of any kind. [Damn, she cooks.]

2. Do you have tools? If you have tools, I won’t let them get rusty. If you have rusty tools, they won’t stay that way. Why? Because I restore tools as a hobby. Don’t worry, I won’t be taking or moving them anywhere. I have my own!

3. Do you enjoy listening to women talk your ear off about nothing that interests you? Or, worse, about things that confuse or frustrate you? I don’t either. I have never been a chatty person who talks just to fill up silent spaces. I like silent spaces. There is nothing awkward about silence, in my opinion.

4. Do you enjoy cleaning? If you don’t, that is great because I enjoy it and, frankly, I am not sure what I think of men who are compulsively neat. If you are more fastidiously clean than I am, we are probably not a great match. [I’ve always been suspicious of guys who are neat freaks]

5. Do you have an ego? Meaning, has anyone ever described you as an a**h*le? I hope so, because I believe men have egos for a good reason and I like to feed them. Well. If you have never been an a**h*le, again, we probably aren’t a great match. Men are either valiant or violent [Ed. – this is simplistic and I’m not on board with it]. If you have not been with a woman, lately, who appreciates the things about you that are “male”, you will simply love me.

6. Do you like having intelligent discussions about interesting topics? I do, too. How about a sense of humor? If you like to laugh, you’ll like me. If you like to make me laugh, too, we might be quick friends.

7. Do you like to enjoy your hard-earned money? You should. Your wallet is safe around me. I have never expected anyone to support me financially. I work hard, too. I understand.

So, what’s the catch? Well, I am a woman in her 40’s, so, I don’t bring the same appeal as a young woman does. I am also divorced and have children. My children are adults and self-supporting, however. I am hardly perfect. I am not a 10, but, I would be a solid 7 on even my worst days. As for age, I have acquired wisdom that saves us both the aggravation of navigating my changing moodscape. I know that feelings aren’t facts. The worst you’ll experience is my taking time alone to process my emotions before I discuss anything that requires a rational contribution on my part.

As far as appearance, my rule is simple, my dress size should be about the same as my shoe size. I wear an 8.5 shoe, by the way. I keep my hair long. It’s blonde. My eyes are blue. I am 5’6? and I have no hang ups about men’s height. If you are anywhere between 5’4 and 8’11, we’ll be ok.

What am I attracted to? I am open-minded. I suppose I find open minds attractive, as well. I don’t tolerate physical violence and I promise I am not inclined to do those things that push a man to respond with violence. We both know the type.

To be fair, and realistic, I am a woman. By nature, You and I are different in many ways [Men and women are different, duh]. I will honor and respect those differences and can only ask that you do, too.

In subsequent correspondence, the profile writer wrote that she had over 625 total responses since posting the profile back in May of this year. Given the words in her profile, I am not surprised. Here is a woman who is willing – based on her words – to actually respect a man’s needs in the context of dating. Of course it helps that she’s blonde and attractive. Some will argue that her appearance is the only reason she gets so much online attention. But given the excellent written content of the profile, I argue that the photos are only a part of the motivation for so many guys to respond to her.

Just yesterday (08/16/2015), here is the response breakdown in her own words:

Since yesterday morning, 126 men on the site indicated they wanted to meet me using the “meet me” feature on the site (a slideshow of profile pictures and profile headline) And, 90 men viewed my profile, directly. and 6 men ‘favorited’ my profile.


Of the 126 indicating they wanted to meet me through PoF’s “meet me” feature, some or all 90 of these men clicked through to view my profile, directly. Some apparently decided they would meet me based on the photo and headline shown.

Of those 90 direct profile views, 11 resulted in a message, 6 resulted in my profile being marked as a ‘favorite’.

This response rate in just one day clearly shows that men are starved for a woman who understands what they want. If women doing online dating understood this, they wouldn’t be single very long. But instead, the message women receive is that they should make demands of men; insist that men cowtow to the feminine imperative. So few profiles written by women actually state what they offer a man. It seems some sort of contemporary shibboleth for a woman to explicitly state what she offers a man that he actually desires in a woman.

As an aside, here’s my standard online dating advice for guys. Don’t use the one button shortcuts or the “favorite” function. Send the message as soon as the profile is displayed and the woman looks appealing. The message should be short but customized for each profile. There’s more online dating advice for men here.

There are posts that I wish more women would read. This is one of those posts.

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