The War Between The Sexes
I’ve heard this expression often over the past couple of decades. This is the concept that men and women are involved in some type of conflict over ideology, politics, and interpersonal relationships. There is a lot truth to that. As is patently obvious, men and women are different. Such differences result in conflicts.
Yet, men and women want and need each other. Politics and ideology must be dismissed when it comes to interpersonal relationships ‘twixt the sexes. Such a dismissal would reduce the war between the sexes to something more manageable. Ideology and politics have no business in personal relationships. Social justice warriors (SJWs) keep on trying to insert ideology into personal relationships. That’s a huge source of conflict between the sexes.
I have huge pity for the younger generation that must deal with current ideological expectations vis a vis interpersonal relationships with the opposite sex. It has become very polarized but not one sex against the other. Rather, the sexes – male and female – are divided into separate camps, two groups of men, two groups of women. And such polarization is not age-dependent.
It works something like this… the two groups of men consist of those with confidence and charisma (learned or natural) and those without. One group is noticed by women, the other group is ignored by women. There are ways for women to actually notice those invisible men. But frankly, it’s up to men to be noticed. It can be learned and it can be accomplished. Here’s a good start: www.succeedsocially.com. Being invisible to women is what the majority of men must cope with.
As for women, the two camps are divided as well. One group of women wants to be “strong and independent”, in effect, more masculine. The other camp, the much smaller one, is all about being being feminine. It’s easy to observe the first camp of women, especially from online dating profiles. They describes themselves with masculine words. They also highlight their travels and other achievements that don’t raise her attractiveness to high value men. The feminine women are noticed by men.
Men looking to be more noticeable to women have to watch out for the vicious cycle of lies and misinformation. This cycle has resulted in something of an psychological arms race where women up their masculinity because they believe (through projection) that men are attracted to masculine women. Guys have to then increase their masculinity even more.
This is an untenable cultural situation. Google up some Maureen Dowd to see how this end game plays out. No one is content except the top-flight Alpha guys who can play the field with a huge age range of women. The high achieving women – in a man’s world – limit more and more of their relationship options as they move up the capitalistic and educational food chain. My dating coach peer, Evan Marc Katz, deals with this constantly. . Another peer, Bobbi Palmer, also copes with this same problem. Both of these dating coaches have all-female clients: high achieving single women looking to meet their relationship goals.
For guys, the takeaway is this: When doing online dating always look for more feminine profiles. Eschew profiles that use the code-words of bossy and domineering women. For real life, pay attention to women who make an effort to appear feminine. They may not have perfect figures or faces, but femininity is profoundly alluring and such women almost demand your attention, even if a simple “hello” along with some honest eye contact.
For women, the advice is simple and blunt: Men are not attracted to masculine women. You dames know what to do.
The war between the sexes can easily be reduced to a minor skirmish.