The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “September 2, 2015”

Mr. Cellophane

One of my Twitter followers is a fine fellow from Israel who sometimes writes for The Times of Israel (it’s in English) and is also is the editor of a publication in Hebrew but with English available. Avi Woolf is his name (on Twitter, @AviWoolf). This post will not be about middle-east geo-politics, be advised. My blog doesn’t cover such issues because such discussions do little or nothing to enhance a man’s charisma. Worse, such discussions can too easily turn a man into a blowhard, a truly ugly character.

In his writing for The Times of Israel, Avi brought up the concept of “Mr. Cellophane”. It’s a brilliant analogy. There is much talk in the Manosphere about the large majority of invisible men. In reality, these men are not quite invisible. Rather, they can be seen but only in the context when they are useful, particularly to women. So, the Mr. Cellophanes, like real cellophane, are only visible when having a function that serves the feminine imperative. In fact, the only time we notice cellophane is when we run out of it. The same goes for the Mr. Cellophanes. When not available, there loss is bemoaned by the estrogen set.

Being  useful is not a bad masculine quality in itself because men are essentially builders. The desire to be useful is something most men possess. One could argue that such a feeling is hardwired into a man’s DNA, sociopaths and psychopaths not withstanding. The problem is being exploited, especially by women, makes a man even more invisible. Mr. Cellophane becomes a schmuck in that regard. He might be exploited for his labor, his money, or his kindly emotional demeanor. Regardless, the key word here is “exploited.”

In describing a particular scenario that happens too frequently with men, I created the Twitter hashtag #IHaveSelfRespect. Mr. Cellophane doesn’t have much self respect and any that he manages to scrape up is usually at his own expense through being exploited. Yes, I see the irony there. By directly addressing these masculine issues, Avi Woolf is helping otherwise transparent but useful men reclaim their self respect. I’m doing much the same thing. In fact, Avi has given me lots of credit for positively impacting his world view regarding social situations and women. I find it flattering that he might be passing along my thoughts to his readers in Israel. That gets the #facepalm hashtag from me.

For my male readers who indulge in the world of Twitter, I would like you to use that hashtag in the context of a Tweet where you state how you did something worth of your own respect. I think this would be a great exercise in getting men to better value themselves. Self respect doesn’t have to be garnered solely when dealing with women. Self respect can come through showing backbone in any context, social or not. Through this blog, I happen to focus on the social elements to life. A man mastering a skill on his own without any kind of social context can revel in self respect quite nicely. Consider a motorcyclist who becomes proficient in counter-steering all by himself without any kudos from his fellow motorcyclists. That’s #Ihaveselfrespect material, right there.

I urge Avi Woolf to keep writing for the Mr. Cellophanes of this world (or, of Israel as it may be). I do take issue with his Twitter avatar because, well, it’s ugly just like my dog. I think Avi and I have much the same goal in helping men to be better men. And guys, don’t be so transparent as to the point of invisibility. Don’t be a Mr. Cellophane.

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