The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Cuddling For Dollars

Read this story first.

Welcome back.

This is important because it speaks to a human need. Many of us get enough physical contact from the opposite sex so that a professional “cuddler” isn’t necessary. However, many men go without such physical contact. Many women have the same issue. Our species, homo sapiens, is a physical one. We need the touch from others. Hell, we’ll accept the closeness of other species as a substitute.

Years ago I travelled to the middle east (United Arab Emirates) and I often observed two guys walking down the street or in the souk, holding hands, as friends. To my western sensibilities, I thought this completely nuts. As I think now, it makes sense. Humans need physical contact with other humans and it doesn’t need to be sexual. I have been reading about older women who are deeply sad that there are no man to provide even a simple hug.

This professional cuddler is a manifestation of a social pathology brought on by recent changes in human culture. Technology is one of them. Also, the atomization of our culture encourages us to remain single and isolated from the physical touch of others. This trend doesn’t end well.

With hook up apps like Tinder on the high seas of “dating”, a man can get some quick sexual touch and for most guys, this can suffices. The professional cuddler, however, is clearly for a smaller group of guys who need more than a sweaty night with bodies conjoined at the genitals. A powerful read on the lack of human touch is M3’s post on being involuntarily celibate (incel) .

The desire for physical closeness with the opposite sex is why I recommend that a woman takes a man’s arm when they’re out perambulating, especially when on a date.  I don’t criticize the professional cuddler. She sees a need in the marketplace and is fulfilling it. I do, however, have criticism of her clients. If they are fairly normal guys, they can up their Charisma so that no cash needs to be involved when physical intimacy occurs.

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8 thoughts on “Cuddling For Dollars

  1. Pingback: Cuddling For Dollars | Manosphere.com

  2. Professional Cuddling is a huge industry in Japan right now, and I guess it isn’t surprising to see it make its way to our shores.

  3. At first I thought you were talking about this lady who started her business in 2011-2012…but apparently there’s more than 1 now. The woman who owns The Snuggery cuddles with both men and women though, of all ages.

    http://m.youtube.com/#/results?q=the%20snuggery&sm=1

    I for one am not in the least surprised by this. As you say, PM, our species is typically a touchy one, like most primates. Heck, like most mammals and even birds. There’s a reason elderly men and women are known for having dogs and cats; As their family moves away and spouses die, sometimes the touch they get from their animal companions is all that is left. For some people this is enough, but for others the lack of human contact leads to depression. In infants, lack of touch (even when otherwise cared for) often means death…a literal failure to thrive.

    Cuddling is still one of the areas where I’m broken, I just can’t get into it. After more than 5 or so minutes I feel suffocated and have an nearly overwhelming desire to do anything else…which is problematic since my FwB is definitely a very touch-focused person. Thankfully, me giving him a massage is a safe compromise for both of us.

    Thanks for talking about this, PM. More people, men especially, need to be aware of the dangers from lack of touch.

  4. A lot of the strip club industry is based on the male desire for physical contact with females. What she is doing is hardly new though it is a new variation on physical contact with no sex. I think part of the success of strip clubs is the rapid decline in the looks and personality of most women. The average female is now very over weight and doesn’t have a very pleasing personality. The few who do can parlay that into a high income being a stripper catering to men who are looking for those traits.

  5. Meggrz on said:

    I’ve noticed this since I started helping to teach salsa classes, as opposed to just attending them. There are a lot of people, men and women, who seek out couples dance classes but are content to never improve or go out dancing socially. This confused me, because I used to assume was the goal. Then I realized a lot of these people are middle aged and divorced and just lonely.

    I realized these classes to them are more about meeting a human need for touch. That’s why I have a never say no policy. If he’s a gentleman, (aka, doesn’t grope or hurt me) every man who asks gets a dance with me. Even the “creepy old guy who steps on your toes” that all the other girls ignore. That attitude women have, demeaning all men who aren’t eligible bachelors, makes me angry.

    Plus, on a more practical note, without practice, how else will they get any better?

  6. evilwhitemalempire on said:

    60$ for a frickin’ hug?

    In pre-Victorian (pre-feminist) London a girl could be had for a night for the price of a haircut in todays money.

    Sex has never been more expensive for men than it is today.

  7. feeriker on said:

    I’m gonna ask a stupid question here: why not just set something up like an online exchange service (think of it as a “dating service lite”) and pair up people who need cuddling/hugs? Not only better for customers from a practical perspective, but for both parties (facilitator and customer) from a financial perspective as well.

  8. Before every action started being perceived as potentially sexual, what you saw was quite the norm even in US: http://www.artofmanliness.com/2012/07/29/bosom-buddies-a-photo-history-of-male-affection/

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