The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “July 26, 2013”

New Comment Policy

All comments are now going into moderation.

Most of the comments are reasonably thoughtful and add to the general discussion about the content of a blog post. Occasionally I get a hater. There are also some very painful, angry, and unhappy comments from men. I understand those negative comments and that’s why I almost always let them through. Men need a safe space to vent their spleens.

The problem is that the comments are directly affecting my personal life. What my readers don’t know is I have publicly announced on my online dating profile that I am a popular blogger. I haven’t yet posted the actual URL, but if anyone requests it, I give it to them. I did this for two reasons – firstly, to see if the change to my profile results in a better response rate; secondly, to get more local women to visit Red Pill Dating,

Several times since I’ve made the change to my profile, I have lost dating opportunities because women have read my blog(s). It wasn’t my posts, it was the comments. My own relatively optimistic outlook is being associated with the those very dark and negative comments. It’s guilt by association and it sucks. That’s the reality of the situation and as everyone knows, I deal with reality.

So, those very negative comments are impacting my dating life. I can live with that to a point. However, my two blogs are now more closely linked so that means any comment-driven negative perceptions of this blog and me as a person are also applied to Red Pill Dating, part of my livelihood. That’s intolerable to me. Guy code clearly states that one man never messes with another man’s livelihood, even if unintentionally.

I have to address this. I have the option to disable commenting completely. This will cause a serious hit to my traffic. Since this blog doesn’t generate any advertising revenue, I can live with that but my ego, less so. This is the thermonuclear solution and I don’t want to go there.

So, I have already implemented a less slash-and-burn approach to those dark and sometimes vicious comments. All comments are now going into moderation. I don’t get a huge number of comments and I have the mobile app for WordPress so this is a manageable task. This requires that I delete older comments, a daunting prospect give the over 10K comments I have received. Also, some regular commenters may find their comments moderated out.

So, if any reader wants to make a comment, consider that one of my potential dates or potential class participants is reading it. I’m asking commenters to mind their words very carefully. I do thank you for your cooperation.

There will also be other changes to my blog.

TL,DR: Nasty comments are ruining Andrew’s dating life and potentially his business. All comments are now moderated. For a comment to get through, it better be good and it better be polite.

Post Navigation