The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “February 4, 2013”

Let Her Be Nurturing

For all the talk of empowered, strong, and independent women not needing a man, there is a large part of the feminine psyche that almost compels a woman to be nurturing. It is especially pronounced past a certain age. For you younger men, sit this one out and be patient with the feisty and sassy girls that thickly populate your demographic landscape. Things might get better for you.

For a single guy who has become independent and self-sufficient, it may be a bit alarming when a woman shows her nurturing tendencies towards him. Single guys can too easily become cynical with the dating landscape so when a women wants to cook him dinner he might get suspicious about her motives. Worse, he might have too many blue pill and politically correct tendencies so his urge (not instinct) is to resist her nurturing because it’s too “gender normative” or “oppressive”. Gag.

Don’t be cynical or uncomfortable. If a woman is attracted to you and comfortable with you, her feminine and nurturing qualities will likely surface. That’s excellent and should always be encouraged. It’s almost like a reverse fitness test. “Can he happily accept my nurturing or is he a weak, PC-filled, sensitive new age guy?”

Many women – especially those who have raised children – are still quite content to express their nurturing through cooking. Let them, dammit! Don’t rush in to help, you’re just getting in the way. Pour the drinks, indulge in some light-hearted talk, and be encouraging by being affectionate – just don’t interrupt too much.

Too many guys will ruin this by tapping away on the smart phone or drifting away to watch TV. This is very bad. Despite the fact that she’s doing the big portion of the work, you’re still sharing an activity. It’s just like a date so give her your attention because you’re getting hers.

This is analogous to the “let the man lead” in dating. Let the woman be nurturing. She’s showing her femininity and that’s to be seriously encouraged. After dinner, there’s nothing wrong with helping to clear the dishes, by the way. Don’t be too lazy because you’re encouraging femininity, a commodity is short supply. If she never shows any nurturing towards you, consider that a yellow-flag.

Post Navigation