The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “June 12, 2012”

Outcome Independence – Find Her Flaw

While talking Red Pill wisdom with a younger colleague (single guy), he expressed curiosity about the concept of outcome independence. He was going to a music event over the weekend and was looking for some motivation because he was fully intending to socially interact with girls during the concert. He was skeptical about outcome independence as he knew full well that a man’s DNA wants him to be outcome dependent.

I acknowledged the dilemma he would face. I imagined him talking to some hot girl and all during the conversation his DNA would be screaming “do something, say something to get this girl to have sex with you!” I told him this one piece of simple advice:

“Find her flaw.”

This guy is 26 years old. His biological imperative regarding procreation is strong. Translated – he’s fucking horny. Fortunately, he’s a smart guy and absorbs Red Pill wisdom like a sponge. He considered that advice for a moment. “I’ll do that.”

Even the hottest girl has a flaw. It could be an ugly regional accent. It could be that she laughs like a braying donkey. It could be that her nose is slightly off-center. For a man to attain any kind of outcome independence, he must find that flaw and silently focus on it during the course of the social interaction.

This is a very difficult lesson for guys just starting to work on their Charisma. Too many younger men were taught to put girls on the pedestal and ignore their flaws. Finding a woman’s flaw(s) takes strength and incredible resolve. The more physically attractive the girl, the more a man must work to find – and then focus on – the the flaw. If she’s also pleasant and friendly, then it becomes a truly herculean effort.

This advice might seem negative. It’s not. This is Dating 2.0 where a man needs every skill and tactic in order for him to achieve his relationship goals. Removing outcome dependence is one of the most important tactics.

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