The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Female Attention Deficit Disorder (FADD)

This is not the disorder where a woman’s attention span is way too short and her brain is too easily distracted. That’s an issue that covers both genders. Female Attention Deficit Disorder (FADD) is the deficit of the general attention that women crave and a pathological reaction to the lack of that attention. A woman with FADD will do almost anything to get that attention, especially from men. In street talk, we’re talking about an attention whore.

FADD is rather endemic, unfortunately. It spans all ages. We’ve all seen its symptoms:

  • Obnoxious drunkenness
  • Young women kissing other young women when in public
  • Wildly immodest clothes
  • Inappropriately youthful fashion
  • Constant texting, calling, IMing, etc.
  • Inability to spend any time alone
  • Nightclub dancing that involves lots of grinding
  • Tiny dog in her purse
  • Random flaking on dates or planned social get-togethers
  • Children who are “my best friend(s)”
  • Cockteasing
  • Non-stop social activities
  • A desire to be a porn star or an actual sex video on the ‘Net
  • Over-the-top opinionated

For a short term fling, a girl with FADD is an easy mark and she is relatively easy to attract. Give her attention in spurts (heh) and use the Push-Pull element of Charisma. FADD women are good candidates to be included in a soft harem scenario. They are poor candidates for a long-term relationship because such women are at the  zenith of high maintenance.

Having FADD is certainly a sign of insecurity but it’s also a strong manifestation of the Princess Entitlement Complex where a woman expects all sorts of attention merely because she possesses ladyparts. Immaturity is also part of the mix. FADD girls love the company of men because most men will put up with their constant demands for attention. Other FADD ladies will cause conflict because of the competition for attention.

It’s actually challenging to find a girl without FADD. It’s been said that attention is the emotional currency of women. A woman who isn’t a slave to her attention-getting behavior is rare.

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25 thoughts on “Female Attention Deficit Disorder (FADD)

  1. P Ray on said:

    If you’re around a girl who develops FADD when you try to speak to her,
    move on.
    Because that kind of disrespect will only get worse if you choose to be in a long-term relationship with her,
    and a bad marriage will cost you your emotions, health, money, time and other opportunities (time you are with someone unsuitable, is time that you lose on your own hobbies, or to be with someone suitable).

  2. cider on said:

    Even worse are Christian women with FADD….. they’ll drive a man to drink

  3. Miss_Fu on said:

    An alternate acronym to FADD can be KKK, or the Kim Kardashian Komplex.

  4. Tam the Bam on said:

    That’s .. uncanny. Didn’t realise you’d toured the UK, incognito.
    One-hundred-and-eighty! Apart from “*Tiny dog in her purse”.
    More likely to be a kebab.
    Unless that’s disgraceful US slang for something else entirely.

    “IMing”. They should have that inked on their chests.

  5. just visiting on said:

    I used to know a woman like this. Out of the blue she developed asthma, which would crop up whenever she needed to get out of doing something, or when she wanted attention. She pulled it on me once, going so far as to “faint”. As the crowd surrounded, everyone was asking what happened, someone should call a doctor. I told them to call a psychiatrist. Then left. She came running out to the parking lot (lest she be left stranded.) Never had an asthma attack again.

    • Good for you. Serves her right.

    • Hamster Tamer on said:

      Sounds like classic Histrionic Personality Disorder, also from the DSM-IV, Cluster B sub-types.

      Admit it–she had a SLAMMIN’ bod, else you nor any other stud would’ve tolerated it, even for a week. Gotta be at least an HB8, and/or possess “advanced bedroom skills”, to pull off the fainting woe-is-me thaaang… AMHIK, lulz. The 6’s can’t pull this, and they know it.

      • just visiting on said:

        Hahahaha. No, size16 at the time, whaled out to a size 24. Delusions of hotness. Daughter of a friend of my mother. (Though as a hetero female, her looks wouldn’t have mattered.)

        I think you nailed it with the histrionic personality, her behavior that day was pretty typical. Though I’d have to say, plenty of male company. Perhaps the sheer emotionalism is what hooked them?

  6. Jay in DC on said:

    “Wildly immodest clothes”. This occurs in jailbait years now. I -marvel- at how sexualized young girls are now with no second thought from parents. I see it every Saturday night on DC Metro, I saw it this weekend in Annapolis, MD. Girls that are probably between 15 and 19 dressed in the same outfit that hookers use to where not long ago. I was with one of my spinning plates in Annapolis this weekend and was like “Wow”. She- “Wow, what?” Those 2 girls that just walked by… Her: “The teenagers?” Me: “Yeah, I would fuck them 8 ways to Sunday and I’m closer to 40 than 30.” Her- “Umm, ok.”

    If you let your 16 year old dress like a whore, guess what? Men from 16 to 66 are going to want to nut off inside of her. Period. Have all the slut walks you want, embrace feminism, do whatever makes you feel good, but at the end of the day, your daughter is dressed like a street whore, and God Bless You for letting her show off those taut young legs and tits to me.

    • j24601 on said:

      “If you let your 16 year old dress like a whore, guess what? Men from 16 to 66 are going to want to nut off inside of her. Period.”

      Amen to that, brother.

  7. Hamster Tamer on said:

    TPM has NAILED it, and laid it out, chapter and verse. Very cogent rundown of what is running us down–pun me, then beer me.

    But, as you say, it’s endemic–virtually unavoidable–thus I’ve had to concentrate my dating efforts on: a) Measuring it early on, against my (somewhat variable) level of tolerance; and then b) managing it/feeding it, until it “gets old”… see the DSM-IV, Cluster B Personality Disorders for the psychiatric underpinnings.

  8. blogster on said:

    Good post.

    I think it was heartiste who said that there is a kernel of attention whore in nearly all women.

    Aside from knowing this and watching for the signs/using it to screen, it is powerful knowledge to apply as an offensive weapon.

    When a certain woman deserves it and it is appropriate – ignore her. I remember I discovered this one by accident and the effect is devastating. Never seen women as angry as when they are ignored whilst blatantly trying to get attention, ha ha.

  9. Jacquie on said:

    Hi, I’m Jacquie …and I’m an attentionholic. It’s been about a year since my last craving.

    Okay, funny aside.

    –“It’s actually challenging to find a girl without FADD. It’s been said that attention is the emotional currency of women. A woman who isn’t a slave to her attention-getting behavior is rare.”–

    I’m glad that you said challenging and rare instead of impossible or ‘not going to happen.’ Since pulling my head together from the noxious fog of BS I’ve been fed most of my life I have seen things differently and many times have been ashamed when I’ve seen women exhibit the same behavior I once did.

    But I also feel I must emphasize that there are females that do not, or no longer, hold this mode of thought. It is not a hopeless or futile search. The problem is there is a danger in showing different behavior patterns, especially among those who would quickly rip you up and spit you out for ‘betraying’ your own gender. I am strong enough to not care what most of them think since I have a strong man in my life who is my support and lets me know that he is pleased with who I am and how I behave, now. I shudder for the females who are unattached and convinced that is how they must act even if it goes against what they believe, or they may as well stay home because if they offer an alternative to the men they might meet, they would be run off by the FADD’s in the general area.

    It’s a damn tough world out there and difficult to navigate from all sides.

  10. Haha I came here researching ADD for a paper but ended up reading the whole thing. Recently, my girlfriend began displaying signs of FADD symptoms. Is there any medication for this? Shock therapy?

  11. AnonymousDog on said:

    Endemic? Maybe where you live. Can’t say as I’ve seen much of it in my part of the Midwest.

  12. Phoenix on said:

    The only cure I can think of this is your status. If you have fame, then all that ADD shit goes away.

  13. irishmaninsoflo on said:

    Another thing is if they don’t get the attention from whatever shiny object they fixate upon,they tend to go into emotional meltdown, it is truly hilarious to witness.

  14. I have a good friend who is turning into one of these. It’s heartbreaking, and almost impossible to stop, because most of the men in her life are giving her all the positive reinforcement her FADD could ever desire.

    She’s been bumped into the ‘do not trust’ satellite area of my friend group. I imagine I’ll have to cut her out completely at some point in the future if things continue to progress. It’s sad, but I’m not going to let her drag me down into her swamp of crazy.

    • P Ray on said:

      The “cut her out completely at some point” strategy only works if it’s CLEO approved.
      Did you read that article?
      The 4 steps (which women also use against men, NO SURPRISE):
      1. say that you’re busy
      2. then deliberately cut short get-togethers
      3. then be uncontactable
      Then when the person gets angry,
      4. rationalise in your head that you were trying to protect their feelings (a lie: you are trying to protect your self-image to others), then tell them that “I cannot continue being around an angry person”.

      I was going to put a question mark in there somewhere, along with the words PROFIT, but I think you’ll manage that by yourself just fine.

  15. Life Is Good on said:

    If I’m stuck with an FADD type, I actually prefer her to have a tiny dog in her purse. You’re almost guaranteed intelligent conversation and maybe some genuine affection. From the dog, of course.

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