The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Nuking The Hamster

I was chatting online with Danny the other day. I mentioned to him that each time I hear a woman talk about a guy involved with a much younger woman, I always support the guy in the situation. “How old?… I want to be like that guy.” That sets the tone of the conversation and my frame.

Danny took it a few steps forward:

I SLAMMED a 43-year-old woman a few weeks ago. she overheard me teaching Red Pill stuff to a 22-year-old dude and chimed in, “son, please tell me you aren’t buying into his bullshit.”

I asked her how many cats she had and she gave me a MEAN look. I showed the guy a pic of a stripper, “she 23.”

His eyes got wide and the woman said, “boy, you have no idea what I could do to you.”

I BLASTED her, “yeah, i’m trading in my caddy for a geo metro.” Even the bartender was cracking up. She had no reply.

I told her, “the sad thing is, you’re actually pretty, but that attitude of yours is gonna keep you and 10 cats VERY single.”


Danny nuked her hamster.

I propose a new Manosphere phrase: “Nuking the hamster”. This is when a man has to directly confront a woman’s rationalization hamster and knock it out off its wheel with carefully constructed words and phrases. It’s an insult, to be sure. But it’s an insult that wields Red Pill wisdom and is not just some random put-down.

Nuking the hamster can be very direct:

“You’re not attractive enough to expect George Clooney to interrupt his schedule.”

“Yo, Princess, get over yourself, you don’t deserve Prince Charming.”

It can also be much more subtle:

“How many cats do you have?”

Nuking the hamster will very likely end the conversation. The response will likely be anger, annoyance at the very least. Nuking the hamster is not Charisma, it is certainly impolite and strictly reserved for hopeless women who simply refuse to understand that they must bring something to the dating/relationship table.

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43 thoughts on “Nuking The Hamster

  1. I like it. I picture a cute little hamster, looking at you with complete, disarming trust,all cuddly sweet, and then the camera fades away and we see next to his spinning wheel a carbon copy of “Little Boy”, the bomb dropped from the Enola Gay on Hiroshima August 3, 1945, and as the hamster’s curiosity gets the better of him and he innocently noses around the device………………………… KAAAABLAAAAAAMMMMMM! we get a full uranium based nuclear explosion, blowing the holy fucking shit out of everything, smashing the entire surrounding city to smitherenes, complete annihilation for miles and miles (The Who) and knocking everything else ass-over-teacup for 50 more, finally turning into that fatal hellish mushroom cloud, dark as Satan’s own sin, so dark its very existence extinguishes every vestige of hope in the heart of mankind, so evil in appearance that it caused Oppenheimer, the “bomb”s creator, upon witnessing the inaugural Trinity explosion to quote from the Bhagavad Gita Lord Krishna’s revelatory statement to Arjuna: “NOW I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS!”

    Yes, I think that captures the concept rather well, what? (limeyness creeping in,; no more plankton visits tonight)

  2. Kudos to Danny (Yea, I know that word sounds gay).

    Its the older women in their 40’s and 50’s that are still sexually attractive that have the biggest ego’s. Every single woman of this category that I have dated had a major attitude that needed adjusting. These women need their hamster nuked with a 20 megaton fusion element.

    If you are a 40-50 year old alpha, you really have it made.

    • Thank you. I LOVE doing shit like that to shrews.
      “you don’t know what I could do to you.”
      Pfsh…if I LET you. No thanks.

      • Well played, Sir.

        Just occurred to me: “you don’t know what I could do to you” . . .

        response: Oh my God, did you just threaten me? It sounded like a threat. Jesus, lady, relax, okay? I know you’re bitter and . . . bitter, but don’t take out your hatred of men with violence — try interpretive dance, instead! Just be careful you don’t break a hip, okay?”

  3. DC Phil on said:

    Reminds me of the one Roosh post where, when confronted with an insufferable attention whore or a girl who was being just plain annoying, he made sure to say things that caused her to go into an emotional tailspin. His rationale? If the chick seemed to be doing her damnest to make his evening unpleasant, why not do it to her, especially if she was in desperate need of being taken town a few notches.

    And, his coda: since women operate on feelings, anything you do to stir up that hornet’s nest in a negative way will have lasting effects.

    • DC
      Right on. My wife was watching “Real Housewives of Bumfuck” last night. 2 or 3 of these dizzy bitches want to open a restaurant, presumably high end. None have been in any business, let alone was as brutally cuthroat as the restaurant business . Now, one (not involved in the restaurant deal) starts telling them about all the work ( a lot of it legal) they need to do to get started, By/sell agreement, lease, vendor agreements, financing, incorporation etc. The other 3 state off camera “Oh she’s going through a divorce, that’s why she’s being so negative!” No you dumb twat-negative is when you’ve spent $300,000, have a lease, a ton of restaurant equipment you’re either are paying off or own outright (which might get you .30 cents on the dollar if you’re lucky), a vendor who refuses to send more stock until you pay his bill and then cash only after that, and a slew of employees taking you to the Wage & Hour board for backpay, and you discover because you chintzed on the legal work you are all personally liable for it all.

      Nothing emotional about that.

  4. beta_plus on said:

    Is the nuking part a mushroom cloud or a microwave? I love the term, but I want to make sure that I use it correctly.

  5. Love it. Incorporated it in to my blog as “Manospeak” (right column, towards the bottom).

    Suggest you start a “Atomic Hamster Arsenal” page full of Hamster-nuking goodness: phrases, stories, you name it. Personal faves:

    “Sweetie . . . no. That’s just . . . god, how embarrassing for you . . .” turn away quickly, change the subject abruptly.

    (Loudly) “Mother, you know how you get when you haven’t had your pill!”

    “What could you POSSIBLY provide me that a lusty 25 year old hottie can’t? Besides self-loathing and therapy?”

    (thoughtfully) “You know, maybe if I had a few more drinks . . . and it was darker . . . really darker . . . nah, who am I kidding?”

    (gently) “All right, all right, I’ll admit, you’re kind of attractive . . . for an old lady . . . quite . . . well-preserved . . . ” (fade off uncomfortably)

    “Actually, I do know a dude with a wrinkle fetish . . .”

    (feigning panic) “I’m feeling uncomfortable! I need an adult! I NEED AN ADULT!”

    “So if you were a whore, how much would you charge? And what would I get for my money? And let’s not do this in 1986 dollars, okay?” (there’s no specific punch-line to this — it’s just fun watching their hamsters spin out of control before they go nuclear)

    “So let me get this straight . . . a man with good looks, money, charisma and power would prefer you . . . (give a long, painful, silent stare up and down) . . . to a 25 year old stripper . . . why? Senior discount at Shoney’s?”

    (eyes widen with recognition) “That’s right! I recognize you now — you were ‘Granny Jessica’ in GILFy Pleasures, the interracial double penetration scene! God, I’m such a huge fan . . . you’ve got the hottest cankles . . . could you sign this napkin? Can I get a pic for Facebook? Wow, what an honor . . .”

    And so on.

    Anyone else?

  6. Richard on said:

    “yeah, i’m trading in my caddy for a geo metro.”

    I don’t get it. Can anyone help?

    • Miss_Fu on said:

      A caddy, or Cadillac, is an pretty expensive car brand. Classy, gorgeous, demanding attention. That’s the 25 year-old stripper.

      A Geo Metro is an obsolete car (hasn’t been made since the mid 90s, perhaps?). It was an ugly, poorly manufactured, insignificant piece of junk. That’s the cougar.

  7. Let’s all remember that nuking the hamster is not a random insult. It’s a carefully worded phrase that specifically addresses the rationalizations committed by that hamster.

  8. A woman I went to high school with (and had just hit 40) was bitching last year on Facebook about how men should be required to date as much older than they are as they’ll date younger. Basically, she was pissed that her 30 year old neighbor wouldn’t hook up with her. My girlfriend had one of the best responses to that, having not even seen the woman:

    “She’s obviously not very hot. Men don’t really care how old you are if you’re hot.”

    • Women “get” us guys completely, but then we’re about as complicated as tinker toy. I don’t think men ever really get women, at least I know I never did. You learn to spot cues and avoid landmines, but that’s about it.

      And Brian your girlfriend is totally right. 10 years ain’t all that if she’s hot i e pretty and in shape. And pussies taste the same at 40 as at 30.

  9. Navian on said:

    “Actually, I do know a dude with a wrinkle fetish . . .”Damn thats brutal , I like it” should be used only for those who truly deserve it.

    • Agreed. “With great power comes great responsibility”. This level of nuclear deterrent should be reserved for the most irritating and self-deluded of screechtards.

      Personally, I have nothing against a MILF or Cougar who takes care of herself and understands the reality of the situation — experience does bring something to the table. But if she starts acting like a 20-something diva . . .

      Nuke the Hamster from orbit.

      It’s the only way to be sure.

  10. ScottA on said:

    “You look pretty good…for your age always” reminds them of how old they are. If they ask “how old do you think I am?” Add 5 years

    • P Ray on said:

      Another one:
      Grandma, this is why I like to go out on my own. I need friends I can relate to 🙂

    • “You look pretty good…for your age”

      That’s money right there. Classic neg as it is ambiguous, has plausible deniability, when delivered lightly but with a nice pause- are you saying shes really old? are you saying she could be hotter? No of course not, it was a compliment! If you keep moving the conversation on before she can respond, her mind will keep going back to that, which is good.

      Now if you’re wanting to be a complete dick, you snort, add a little sarcasm in between dropping “for your age”, execute full back turn, totally ignoring her from then on. There will be tears.

  11. yankemoff on said:

    Nuking the Hamster is a pretty good phrase, but let’s just hope that Nuking the Hamster jokes don’t get old too fast.


    I went very briefly to my 40 year reunion 2 years ago. Get this-about 1/2 the women did not wear their name tags which had their 1970 graduation pic. Yeah. I had mine-fuck, I don’t look like I did 40 years ago and they looked even worse! I spent about 25 minutes (a disproportionate amount of my hour plus stay) talking to some bitch who claimed to have lived on my street-I had no clue. Had I been a privateman reader then I’d have said “I have no clue who you are-why aren’t you wearing a name tag? The only way I’d remember you is if you’d given me my first blow job, and then only if you were sucking my dick right now.” The women, with one or 2 marginal exceptions, looked every bit of their approaching 60s but apparently thought we’d recognize them as their teenage selves.

    • Munson: I went to my 25th HS reunion last fall. Let’s just say most of the women looked every bit their mid-40s age. Most of them looked like they had…. SWELLED. Caught up with them on Facebook, and I had to do double takes on many of them.

  13. Brilliant work. I’m stealing the “cat” line.

  14. Pingback: HeMail: Nuking the Hamster | THE UNIVERSITY OF MAN

  15. As Foucault said in the Courage of Truth: “Truth destroys the discussion.”

    Thus, nuking the hamster means telling the truth.

    But, in some debates, for the women it`s not the truth that counts, it`s how the speech is said, with all its phallacies. In practice, the emocional speech women give when the cloud of carefully selected pretty lies are destroyed, disrupts the emotional havoc A.K.A. hitting the wall.

  16. atholkaymarriedmansexlife on said:

    “Honey I’m loaded, I don’t have to settle.”

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  21. Anonymous on said:

    Playin’ the dozens, homie! Put the cap on the rap tighter than “Yo’ ass was so ugly, yo’ mama had to tie a pork chop around your neck to get the dog to play wit’ you!”

  22. Pingback: HeMail: Nuking The Hamster « stagedreality

  23. Pingback: Unleash The Neg! | The Private Man

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