The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Female Sexual Competitiveness

I just ended a five month employment contract at a large wireless telecom company. The commute was simply awful (on a motorcycle, no less) but the corporate environment was simply awesome. The headquarters employed several hundred people in one, single-storey building. The absolute best part of that contract employment was the competitive nature of the women who worked there and it’s not what you think.

It was a Latin-American company.

For those of you unfamiliar with Latin culture (I mean Central and South America in this case), the women compete ruthlessly with each other. Unlike in female gringa workplace culture where women compete with each other to be more masculine, latinas compete with each other to be more feminine, even in the workplace. They compete to look more feminine.

It was an amazing and a splendor to behold.

I’m not going to speak to words and attitudes expressed by my recent Latina peers, I will only comment on the visual impressions. This is because I don’t speak or understand much Spanish. The whole experience was quite visual in that the women truly made an effort to look feminine without looking too provocative. For the most part, they succeeded. There was wonderfully feminine appearance that rarely, if ever, crossed the line into slutty tackiness. The cafeteria at lunch was wonderful.

As I was in the Information Technology department, it was mostly male oriented. The eight or nine women in my department were girl-geeks, always an interested sub-group. But these were girl geeks of a determinedly different order. They didn’t lose their femininity. While at work, their hair was done well, their clothes didn’t hide their figures, their heels were more than 1 inch tall. It was quite remarkable.

The guys didn’t gawk, they didn’t leer, they treated their feminine peers with respect. Never once did I hear an overtly sexual comment, even when it was all just guys talking. Thankfully, English was the common language in my department because of all my Indian colleagues. I could hear the conversations across the cubicles.

This all harkens back to my Woman Up! trifecta of blogs. Women should be feminine. I am not stupid and I know that the workplace attitude must be more masculine. But that doesn’t mean a losing a feminine appearance. Sadly, I am about to take a job in a more anglo-saxon, North Americanized work environment. It won’t be pretty like my previous gig.

Let’s all say it again – the feminine attracts the masculine.

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17 thoughts on “Female Sexual Competitiveness

  1. DC Phil on said:

    I can speak from personal experience about how Latina women strive to be feminine, despite not having dated any in my life. (On my bucket list: bang a Latina, or have a short-term Latina girlfriend.) I hope to see this firsthand when I head to South America later this year, with one weekend trip to Miami and the Keys closer to the spring.

    Unfortunately, I don’t see this very often here in DC, despite there being a very large contingent of Central and South Americans. But, then again, I’m talking about the ordinary, run-of-the-mill types you see at the shopping malls, etc. Many of them are too short, dumpy, and just ugly — even the younger ones. But, you sometimes see a good-looking 20-something. Problem is, she’s usually married and has at least two kids. Or, is a single mother with two kids. That’s due to the culture, I understand.

    Of note: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5P9nuO72-s

  2. When I read PM’s post, I want to think of Jennifer Lopez, Eva Longoria, and Selena Gomez clones bending over computers amd desks in tight skirts and high heels, but Im pretty sure it wasn’t that good. Not even close.

    • It was damned close. I will really miss that contract job.

      • You really, REALLY ought to learn Espanol…its one of the easier languages to learn and would improve your chances of getting a great job in your area. Im not an expert on the best way to learn languages, but some situation where you can learn it slowly and at your speed.

        Also some latina dance moves, like Cha-Cha and salsa. If you went in to a Salsa club and could dance reasonably well and speak the language you probably can get at least a 7 or better and dump that hit-the-wall 5 you are really not into.

        Go for it. What do you have to lose?

  3. Phoenix on said:

    At my workplace, I’m curreently ripping on the girls who act too hard and bitchy.

    One girl, who’s a mother of 3 (white girl, half-white and half-black kids), unleashes her ghetto attitude from time to time. To which I reflect it by acting tougher than her big ass does. And I dropped a bomb for her one day:

    “So how big is your cock?”

    She laughed and blushed like crazy. And now she’s made some light physical advancements on her end.

    Hey, don’t blame me. If a girl is gonna act tough and macho, I’ll be sure to put her ass back into place and remove the imaginary dick they’re showing.

    There’s one subject I want to brng up again. She generally smacks her kids when they get out of line. Too bad the father isn’t around to discipline the kids – this kind of behavior from her wouldn’t happen.

  4. The best soundbite of this article is the fact that women compete to be more feminine.That’s needed in more parts of the world.

  5. That’s really interesting, would be fascinating to see that in practice.

  6. jbamai on said:

    This does not surprise me at all. If there is one thing I have learned from my Hispanic friends its that Latina women are much more comfortable in their feminity. I called one of my Hispanic buddies out on him always complementing women he found attractive. (The witty backhanded compliment seems to do the trick on American women) He rebuffed me and explained this is part of the culture.

    Whereas American women tend to take compliments as some kind of fuel for her ever more entitled narcissism, Latina women take it for what is is….a simple compliment….and testament to their femininty.

  7. Random Angeleno on said:

    I’ve been in various forms of IT and internet my entire career. While it’s been remunerative, my one big regret is that the only time I was ever around a lot of women in the workplace, I had no, no, no game at all, way too nice. And so there were at least two good ones who got away. Now that I have a bit more game and understanding, I either don’t find myself around women or else I’m too old for the unattached women I do see. Gah!

    Need to get myself to a 3rd world country or something. But you got me wondering if I could bone up on my Spanish and find a job in Latin America somewhere.

  8. Man, you’re lucky. In the western states (CO, NM, WY, UT, etc), the Americanized versions are mostly angry, ghetto and obese. See Figure 1 below for an example:

    The foreign import models are the traditional “cleaning lady” type. See Figure 2:

    I’ve never seen a Spanish Channel-level hottie in person. I’d like to visit one of these fabled lands where the latinas are actually feminine and attractive.

  9. Simon Rierdon on said:

    PM when I travel to your area in March, I’ll give you the complete five part Rosetta Stone program for Spanish. Plus the one for Mexican Spanish.

  10. Mrs. Pilgrim on said:

    It’s not just Latinas that do this; you just have to have the right circumstances to unlock it. I’ve done it.

    At every job I held, I was the top performer in my workgroup. (I never mentioned that; it was known by the quantity of my work output.) I dressed up rather than in slacks and NEVER did the “Casual Friday” routine; I had make-up on; my hair was aesthetic and not just there.

    The key factor, though, was whether my group had a male or a female supervisor. If we had a male supervisor, he would treat me significantly better than my co-workers–and I was in knee- or calf-length skirts and blouses that covered things. Even though it was against business etiquette, the male supervisor would get doors for me or bid me sit in the only chair. (No, I wasn’t interested in dating middle-aged married men and never gave that impression. It was apparently a reflex on their part.) In those situations, my female co-workers would actually start trying to compete with me–skirts, make-up, new ‘dos, and manicures would start appearing, the ladies would smile more, and things were generally nicer.

    If it was a female supervisor, however, I would get torpedoed. She would treat me like crap despite my job performance, send me out to do piddly errands during important meetings (and leave it up to me to get the information afterwards), and make for damn sure I didn’t get promoted. My co-workers would follow suit, sneering at me like I was a moron, leaving me out of lunch invitations, mocking the long length of my hair, and…general high-school mean-girl behavior.

    So I suppose it depends on the atmosphere, and who’s got his or her hand on the thermostat.

    I hope this brings you hope, gentlemen. It’s a part of female nature that even feminism cannot undo.

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