The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “September 23, 2011”

Support Your Local Dating Coach

Ever since I found Evan Marc Katz, the concept of the dating coach has intrigued me. When I first heard of this concept, I scoffed at the idea. I assumed that such coaches were merely cheerleaders with a “You go, grrl!” approach that encouraged an entitlement princess attitude and fed a woman’s rationalization hamster.

I was both right and wrong. After I signed up for several dating coaches free newsletters and read their blogs, I started seeing a very consistent pattern. On the surface there is a lot of the typical “you’re a fabulous goddess!” type of nonsense. But after I dug into the advice a bit more, I discovered that successful dating coaches for women are dispensing amazing amounts of Red Pill advice.

We in the Manosphere know that we speak the truth about fallibilities of women, especially in regards to dating and relationships. The Red Pill approach simply works. Successful dating coaches know this too, they just aren’t aware that it’s Red Pill stuff.

Here is the crux of the matter: If a dating coach gives bad advice, then he or she is a dating coach no longer. This type of coaching is a business, a capitalistic enterprise. Capitalism is ruthless regarding success and failure. Red Pill dating advice is successful and the successful dating coaches prove it.

Of course, getting through all the feel-good fluff takes a little work. But after drilling through the bullshit, those Red Pill truths are revealed. Consider this wee Red Pill moment from Jenn Burton:

“The more good you find in men, the more good men you will find.”

That’s quite the de-programming from the prevailing, feminist-based view that all men suck and are not worthy of respect. That quote is also a very clever rebuke to “never settle!” As an aside, Jenn Burton actually recommends that women should be dating more than one man at a time. Perhaps women are learning a form of Game to help them cope with the post-40 sexual/marriage market place.

Bobbi Palmer is another dating coach I follow. Her company name is great: “Date Like a Grown Up. Just like other dating coaches, there’s a thick layer of “You go, grrl!” garbage followed up with Red Pill advice that’s delivered with a firm, but velvet covered, pimp hand. I submit this quote from one of her blog posts for consideration:

Want to attract a confident, grounded man who will enhance your already great life? The best way to do it is to act like a lady. Yes, that age-old scenario is still true: masculine men are attracted to feminine women.

The first sentence, the question, is standard women-come-first crap. But Bobbi knows her market well and so she is almost forced to ask that question. Mercifully, the next two sentences hits the nail on the head. Damned right, the feminine attracts the masculine but a generation or two of StrongIndependentWomen™ has forgotten that.  She follows up with an excellent definition of femininity and how women should better deal with men:

Femininity means being open, kind and positive. It means receiving gracefully and giving generously…not of material things but of your heart and your genuine self. It means being his biggest fan and letting him feel that his efforts to please you are appreciated and welcomed.

So, yes, sometimes being a powerful, feminine woman translates into allowing a man to do things you can do for yourself and letting him be right…even when you think he’s not.

That’s some Red Pill advice packaged with contemporary political correctness

I love the delicious irony that 40-something women are funding feminist de-programming through the vehicle of dating coaches, those coaches usually being women as well. Some Manosphere goals may achieved by those unlikely Manosphere allies, the dating coaches for women.

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