The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “September 16, 2011”

Concern Or Control? A Woman’s Shit Test

Several women I have dated over the past few months have expressed their concern regarding my safety when I ride my motorcycle. I’ll fully admit that motorcycling is a dangerous endeavor. Before I took the Red Pill, I thought that the women were offering an expression of affection, fondness, and genuine caring. It’s not. It’s a massive shit test and failing is doom to the hapless guy.

Here is how the shit test is artfully constructed.

1. A woman gets all tingly because the man has a risky enthusiasm. For me, it’s motorcycling but any risky enthusiasm applies. Women are attracted to men who take risks. It’s alpha.

2. The woman realizes that the risky enthusiasm might result in injury or death to the man she finds so attractive. One might think this presents a dilemma. But no, it’s an opportunity for her.

3. She expresses her concern with the risky enthusiasm and starts in with the “you really shouldn’t do that” nagging. She seems so genuine and concerned. Behold, the shit test!

What, you missed it?

It’s a shit test because the woman wants to know if the man can stand up to the nagging. It’s a particularly insidious test because she’s using concern as camouflage for control. It’s also insidious because there is just enough truth to the concern for it to seem a compelling request. A blue pill man will fail the test because he fell for the concern element – borne from a woman’s nurturing and caring characteristics – and completely ignored the control element. I pity the fool.

So the blue pill man cuts back (or completely eliminates) that risky enthusiasm to appease the woman. Perhaps they are living together or even married at this point. Maybe they are just dating. Regardless, it’s all about her needs now. Blue pill men have rationalization hamsters, too.

Suddenly, the woman ends the relationship. She can’t explain exactly why. She’s just “unhappy” with him. The blue pill man is devastated. He was so loving, so attentive. He even sacrificed his beloved and risky enthusiasm on the altar of her happiness. It was all for naught because he failed the shit test and the woman lost respect for him.

Should this unhappy scenario result in divorce, the clever ex-wife will seek just enough monetary extortion so that the ex-husband can’t afford to re-start risky enthusiasm anymore, reducing his potential attractiveness. This will be done with the ForTheChildren™ rationalization on her part when she’s really just trying to increase his barriers to post-marriage nookie.

The take away advice for all men, even the Red Pill variety, is to be extremely cautious regarding a woman’s “concern”. Some of might be indeed genuine but 80% of it is the shit test of control.

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