The Private Man

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Archive for the day “August 17, 2011”

The Female Self-Esteem Crisis

Self-esteem in American girls and women is at a crisis point. It’s so bad that our culture now has a generation of girls and women who are incapable of forming or coping with healthy relationships with the opposite sex. This is evidenced by the “hook up” culture amongst the late teen and early 20s cohort, “combat dating”, a decreasing marriage rate, and a stubbornly high divorce rate. Our society must address the female self-esteem if there is to be any hope for future healthy relationships and intact families.

Simply put, contemporary female self-esteem is far too high. Girls and women think too highly of themselves. Whether a teen-aged princess or a middle-aged goddess, females value themselves far in excess of the social/sexual cultural realities as well as the evolutionary psychology realities.

Excess female self-esteem became a crisis when “you can be anything you want” turned into “you deserve anything you want”. That’s not a subtle shift. It’s a shocking leap into a huge pit of selfishness and egocentrism. Women and girls are now parading about expecting life to cater to their needs, no matter how outrageous they might be. It all centers around one very cancerous and emotionally fatal word, “deserve”. That word crops up almost every time a female expresses her preferences, whether it’s a man, a career, an emotion, or some material object.

A viciously unhealthy corollary to the “I deserve” phenomenon is a flat out refusal to accept, or even analyze, the negative consequences to a female’s decisions and actions. If a girl or woman faces negative consequences because of something she did on her own volition and with her own agency, there is too often blame foisted on something else, usually the nearest man. Then comes the call on government to fix the issue because of the ridiculously illogical argument that the personal is the political.

Furthering the crisis still more, any attempt to rein in a female’s self-esteem or broach the idea of consequences is met with howls of negativity in both the public and private spheres. “You’re trying to control me!” “A man can’t tell a woman what to do!” It should be noted that a female’s rationalization hamster feeds best on the word “deserve”.

While men are also taught that they can be anything they want, the word “deserve” never seems to come up. Rather, the ideas of hard work, sacrifice, self-control, and responsibility are taught to men. Men know that no one deserves much of anything unless those ideas just mentioned are put into play.

There is no large-scale fix to this self-esteem crisis. Men can only respond with their own strategies and tactics to deal with the situation. Is it any wonder why Game has been spreading around more and more? This is a specific tactic developed to counter excess female self-esteem. Men going their own way (MGTOW)? This is a full-blown life strategy to cope with a generation of females with massive egos and poor decision-making skills.

This might be the time to remind women that they don’t deserve much of anything. Sadly, I know that these words can do little in the face of a media, education, and government juggernaut that has effectively ruined women. Yeah, you go grrl.

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