The Private Man

Attraction and dating information for all men

Archive for the day “March 10, 2011”

The Manosphere – The New Men’s Club

There once was a time when men had formal gathering places where women were simply not allowed. Such a place might have been a country club, a yacht club, a fraternal organization, or a business organization.

It’s probable that men got together to discuss ideas – politics, business, society, and women. Women were important to men back then. Most of the men doing the talking were likely married and many likely had daughters. If not married, the men would likely be actively pursuing marriage.

It is a pity that they are no transcripts of the informal discussions amongst those men gathered in those exclusively male environments. Such a record would be remarkable for documenting social history. Perhaps a reader can point to a good book or a source some social history on men’s clubs.

As feminism became an increasingly powerful political force, the men-only institutions came under attack. Some just shut their doors, others allowed women to join. With women present, it is likely that a great deal of self-censorship took place. Mustn’t offend the women folk, after all.

Those feminists sought access to those formal gathering places for equality, at least that’s what they said. I have a different theory. I believe that the feminists were scared that the men were conspiring against them; that men were were whispering unpleasant truths about women. The men were discussing ideas that might be dangerous to the new ideology. So, like using baton-wielding police to break up a political demonstration, lawsuit-wielding lawyers went after the organized places where only men gathered.

The heyday of the men’s club is definitely over. As I never experienced it, I won’t bother to mourn its passing. It’s simply a period of history that needs to be examined more closely when a clever social historian figures there’s a good book deal in it.

The king is dead, long live the king!

The men’s club is back. It’s gone virtual. It’s quite obvious that men are gathering on forums and blogs that cater to the usual masculine enthusiasms such as firearms, motorcycle, body building, cars, etc. Those are things and activities, not necessarily ideas. To be sure, there is usually an off-topic section in these discussion and often ideas are shared. By the way, those off topic message board sections are excellent for recruiting men to the cause.

The Manosphere (I am now capitalizing the word in all future posts and comments) is the new men’s club where ideas are discussed almost exclusively. This is dangerous to feminist ideology. Where feminists once had a serious degree of control of public discourse – the mass media – through politically correct shaming, the men have formed a vast, rather disorganized gathering place immune to shaming and censorship. It gets worse for feminist ideology, the men are discussing ideas.

Ideas are bad for ideologies. Ideas are dangerous to the status quo. Ideas cause revolutions. Ideas cause action. With the right technology, ideas can be spread almost instantaneously.

Note this photo:


It is not surprising that the Good Man Project, a feminist project through Ms Magazine, has had a series of articles on the Men’s Rights Movement, a huge part of the Manosphere. Such articles are an admission of the power of the Manosphere. The ideas of men simply can’t be ignored anymore.

As this wonderful men’s club continues to grow, the next phase of the discussion will be the transformation into action. This will require thousands of more men to be involved. It’s the duty of every man and aware woman to bring in more men to the Manosphere. Right now, it’s a big, messy club. Soon, it will be a movement.

Online Profile Codewords Used By Bossy and Domineering Women

I’ve already covered the concept of the strong and independent woman, here.

In an effort to avoid bossy and domineering women for a long term relationship, men should be on the lookout for the codewords of the women with those unpleasant traits. If any of the codewords are used when a woman describes herself in her online dating profile, be extremely careful.

There is a bonus in that the codewords can often be used to spot an entitlement princess.

Here is the list:

  • Strong and Independent
  • Sassy
  • Headstrong
  • Opinionated
  • Feisty
  • Willful
  • Bold
  • Demanding
  • Ambitious
  • Hard charging
  • Sarcastic
  • Assertive
  • Aggressive
  • A handful
  • Difficult
  • Challenging
  • Tough
  • Smart-aleck
  • Uncompromising
  • Won’t “settle”
  • Usually gets what she wants
  • Competitive
  • Outspoken

It is important to note that many of these words and phrases are applied to men in a far more positive light. Most of these words and phrases describe successful alpha men. If a woman is applying these words to herself, she perceives herself herself as having masculine characteristics. It’s like saying “I have a penis” in an online dating profile.

While a bossy and domineering woman might be fun for something short term or for an alpha man’s harem, these women are extremely bad for a long term relationship because frankly, they’re too damned difficult to put up with for any length of time. After 40 years old, such characteristics become very difficult to de-program, regardless of Game applied.

I do realize that some guys are looking to be let the woman take the lead in a relationship and so they actively seek out bossy and domineering women. I can only take pity on those guys.

There is a vicious social expectation feedback loop that too many men fall into. Bossy and domineering women have become the expected characteristics for women (thanks feminism!). So, men feel (unnecessarily) that they somehow must be attracted to such women. Then, in an effort to attract men, feminine women feel they must become bossy and domineering.

For the rest of us, if we’re honest with ourselves, we seek the feminine. Bossy and domineering is simply not feminine. It’s repellent and ugly. Reject those type of women for long term relationships. They are only good for the short term or for the harem.

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