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I present a list of example headlines in women’s online dating profiles. Most are uninspiring, too many turn me away, and a few will get me to actually read the complete profile. These are from the online dating website, Plenty Of Fish. I am categorizing these headlines into three areas – generic or unexciting, off-putting, and compelling. This only took me about 45 minutes and I only looked at a hundred or so.
I found these profiles doing my standard search: between 36 and 52 years old, thin or athletic figure (though occasionally if childfree or Latina, average), living within 25 miles of me. As I live in the populous Fort Lauderdale area, this search generally yields a hundred or more profiles. These are real headlines and profiles. Yes, I realize the subjective nature of this exercise. As a writer, I do focus on words a great deal and yes, most guys surf the photos. But women don’t want “most” guys.
Note: Correct word usage and grammar counts for me and for any guy with Charisma. The common theme in most doomed headlines is that the women don’t understand they must bring something to the dating and relationship table (see link below). They state what they want – or don’t want – or they use egotistical boasts without the awareness of what men actually want, just what they think men want based on their projection of their wants onto men. A man of a certain age and with Charisma shouldn’t care so much as to what the woman wants, it’s about what she offers that he wants.
I’ve made some comments on particular headlines. Expect some snark. [bracketed boldface].
Generic and unexciting headlines – There is nothing exciting about these headlines. They are used by so many women, so often, it takes a very good photo before I’m inclined to continue reading the profile.
Honesty a must… [burned a few times by cads and married guys?]
The real deal only…. [What does that even mean?]
Please REALLY read my profile before messaging me [Most men surf photos, that will never change]
Looking for someone really special.
Looking to meet someone. [Of course you are, most of the women on PoF are. Except the online attention whores]
Ready for Mr. Right [What were you doing in your 20s and early 30s]
Are You that Special Someone? [Are you?]
Looking for my last, 1st kiss!
Looking for my best friend
Let’s have last first date…………..
Looking for someone genuine [Meaningless]
looking for someone drama free [Actually, you're probably the one with the drama]
Looking for my one and only.
Looking for mr. right [What, not Prince Charming?]
looking for my soul mate…:) [Oh the cliches, THE CLICHES! And stop with the emotional pornography]
Live, Laugh and Love [As generic as it gets]
Still seeking that 1 quality man
Seeking an Optimistic, Brains and Brawn Gent! [What do you offer?]
Looking for my Co-Pilot [Actually, you're seeking a pilot. You're the co-pilot]
Heart of Gold
Cool Girl looking for One Cool Guy!
Looking for a confident man [All women want a confident man and confident men know this]
Off-putting headlines – This is self-explanatory. Entitlement, negativity, anger, demanding, big egos, misandry, not understanding that men are the gatekeepers to commitment… you get the idea. I look particularly for the codewords used by bossy and domineering women (link below) Not even outstanding photos will make me open the profile. Sadly, it’s too easy to find these headlines.
looking for a man not a boy. [That's just awful. And stop dating boys]
No A-holes [And how would you know about A-holes? You're attracted to them!]
if ur wit the gme,and just wnt sex,bye!! [No comment, yeesh]
Take My Breath Away! [At your age and me as the gatekeeper to commitment, that's your job]
UpScale Casual Seeks Same… ["Upscale", the men know exactly what that means]
i need no headline [Uh, yeah, you do]
Can U Mentally Stimulate Me Without Being Sexual? [Date a much older college professor have sex with bad boy]
BEAUTY FADES…….BUT DUMB IS FOREVER![Ah, the misandry]
Fun and sassy!! ["Sassy" is another codeword for bossy and domineering]
Spunky and Homegrown [See directly above]
clowns to the left…jokers to the right [You picked 'em]
Where are the funny guys???? [Right where you left 'em, in your block list]
Compelling headlines – A good headline sucks me (heh) into the profile. I want to read more. I look for humor, self-awareness, positivity, originality, focus on me and not her, etc. I’ll forgive mediocre photos and delve deeper and deeper (oh, the double entendres keep on coming!) into the profile. I wish there were more of such headlines.
Don’t be perfect, be happy! [I like this... thanks and I will!]
Class and Style Will Make You Smile
Older and Wiser!!! [You get it]
Wishing YOU an Amazing Day !!! [Wow, use of the second person, rare even in the profile text]
Guaranteed more fun than your ex! [Lulz]
You always get what you feel. :):):) [Women should be happy and fun and they'll get happy and fun guys]
“There’s no next time. It’s now or never.” [Good quote]
let’s try something different… [Proper introspection should yield change]
to whom it may concern….[This just resonated in me, I don't know why]