Surfer Woman (backstory here) came over to visit on Wednesday. We had too many drinks and I got her to do some cool things in the bedroom. Her unique skill is that of squirting when she orgasms. It’s not just a squirt, it’s a freaking gusher. It’s an interesting distraction and rather entertaining. Consider it a sexual novelty act.
She’s been complaining that she’s not my “Saturday girl”. I take this to mean that I would see her every Saturday night like she’s my steady. When I tell her of my other dates, she gets rather petulant and makes a weak attempt at standoffishness. I laugh it off or simply ignore it. In my beta days, I would have resorted to apologies and promises of a better man in her eyes. But with options regarding women, I have hand and a solid frame.
Usually our communication is via instant messaging and texting. She likes that and I prefer it to real phone calls. Endless verbal chit chat is really nothing more than endless verbal chit chat.
There is some additional backstory to reveal here. Surfer Woman has been divorced for just over a year. She is eager and almost anxious to fulfill her sexual desires and fantasies (before it’s too late because menopause kicks in). Those desires include some rather adventurous things. I have no problem with that because I’ve had an adventurous life. The problem is this – she wants to have adventures and she doesn’t want me to have adventures. She calls it “jealously”. I call it “double standard”.
I have been calling her out on this double standard as often as I can. Enter, stage left, the rationalization hamster. She claims she is a special snowflake (this is all via online chat) and I must submit to her unique needs. I say nothing. She claims that all men a awful, terrible human beings. I ask “So God didn’t create just just one man who is different?” No response, naturally.
Surfer woman is absolutely typical in regards to the entitlement attitude. I am sure that earlier in her life she was a very attractive woman. She married a nice beta fellow and had a life of relative leisure. However, she and her beta husband never had kids. But life is different since she hit the wall. In all honesty, she hit the wall while strapped to a rocket sled.
I won’t take her into the central village. I have a standard. If a woman is cute enough, I will take her across Ocean Drive so the locals can see me with an attractive woman. If not, it’s the dive bar west of Ocean Drive for her. Surfer woman knows the dive bar well.
It’s vastly entertaining that surfer woman is becoming more entitled as she gets older. Online dating serves to reinforce that attitude and she uses it with abandon. She has also alluded to some rather unpleasant online messages she receives. I can only imagine what those messages might say.
Badger
/ June 25, 2011Sounds like this:
http://theprivateman.wordpress.com/2011/05/27/bad-dating-advice/
“Dating in your 30′s changes/matures. You can take a 20 year old to Applebee’s and it is fine but a 30 year old has had time to eat at nicer restaurants and expects more…Women over 30 who are single have had a lot of time to think about “how” they want a man to treat them.”
It is a wacky paradox that many women get more entitled and “expect more” as they grow into a position to demand less. This is especially common among carousel riders, a classic paradigm of “give it up for non-commital alphas, then make beta provider pay for what others got for free.”
The unalloyed bitchiness underlying the attitude can be enraging, but we need to have frame and just not be bothered by it. Besides, the “worst” thing you can do to a woman with this complex is to ignore her, because she’s just looking for attention. When she can no longer swing the attention of highly virile dominant men, she seeks the material provision attention of a sucker.
NMH
/ June 25, 2011I’m not surprised by her sex needs. If the woman has been formerly banged in an LTR, but it ended and she has not been banged in a while and you are the one she wants to bang in a new LTR, she will be excited with sex. This happened to me in the two LTR’s I have been it. Both girls had not had sex in over a year and once it started with me, they wanted it a lot and they purchased books on the subject.
I think you are leading her on, and not living by “the golden rule” with her as I think you should. You know she’s not a keeper, so let her go. She doesn’t have much life left for her to find someone who will take her seriously. It sounds like having her by your side would be a shame, so get rid of her. You are using her for sex…not good.