Snooping And Fishing

Women snoop. Given a chance they will look through your cell phone calls and texts, go through your wallet, dig through your Facebook account, try to get to your emails, eavesdrop on phone calls, etc. When you start dating someone and they are at your place, it’s very important to keep the snoop factor low. Here are some basic guidelines to follow:

1. Code lock your cell phone and keep it in your pocket or out of plain site.
2. Keep your wallet in your pocket
3. Text in private
4. Hide your relationship status in Facebook
5. Destroy your paper receipts
6. Password lock your computer (ctrl-alt-del)
7. Put away personal papers so they are out of view, preferably locked up.
8. Set your phone to silent.
9. Bathrooms are a rich source for women to snoop. Hide anything vaguely incriminating.

For each guideline I have a personal story. I will not be telling those personal stories.

The reason for keeping your wallet and your cellphone in your pockets is for when you might step away for a bathroom break or to tend to something that takes you out of her site when you’re on a date or she’s visiting your place. Young women are far more likely to snoop. A woman with wisdom and experience likely has as much reason to be discreet as a man of wisdom and experience and hopefully she won’t snoop so much.

Fishing is another type of snooping but it’s based on somewhat clever questioning from her. Fishing also involves a fair degree of shit testing, too. Here’s a typical fishing question:

“You didn’t call me last night, did you have a good time?”

There is so much going on with this one question that an ordinary man would reel back, staggering defensively. She’s fishing for information and delivering a shit test all in one.

A younger red pill man would be wise to agree and amplify.

“Damn right I had a good time, those two girls were insatiable.”

An older and wiser red pill man would simply foist off the evening onto a sockpuppet.

“I was talking to my brother, he’s got a minor crisis with his youngster daughter”.

This is a deflection onto another subject and bringing in kids will usually seize the woman’s attention.

“Is everything alright?”

Instead of constructing some stupid story (yeah, it’s a lie, sue me), simply deflect again.

“It’s been resolved, he knows what he has to do.”

Then change the subject back to her. Women love talking about themselves and their feelings.

Fishing for information through conversation is something a man must be on guard for. What might seem a casual and innocuous response could be, unknowingly, too revealing. This especially true in the early dating (pre-nookie) phase. Remember that she is likely looking for reasons to reject you and so fishing is extremely important to her.

A good red pill man maintains some mystery by protecting against snooping and being on guard for fishing.

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  1. #1 by lunchmeat on June 20, 2011 - 11:11 PM

    Doesn’t this go against frame though?

    Yes my phone is always locked and with me but if she hints at snooping through my things its over. My friends don’t go through my stuff, why would I tolerate it from a gf?

    • #2 by theprivateman on June 21, 2011 - 6:24 AM

      No. Privacy is good for frame.

      I agree that snooping is grounds for dumpage. It’s just that young women simply can’t control themselves well enough to stop snooping.

  2. #3 by whiteboykrispy on June 20, 2011 - 11:48 PM

    Spot on.

    I always leave the room with the cell phone in the pocket.

    As for fishing? Something you always gotta be wary of. With the girls my age at least, when I go out without them, they always want to know how my night went. It’s always best to tell them you had a good time with your buddies and got really drunk, nothing more.

    It’s also important to remember what you told them you were doing the night before, if they asked. Gotta keep the stories straight.

  3. #4 by wingman on June 21, 2011 - 7:16 AM

    The anti-fishing radar should be up for married men as well – woe be to the guy who leaves his unprotected phone in the open. Two of my close friends went down an ugly path as result.

  4. #5 by NMH on June 21, 2011 - 7:53 AM

    I’m still figuring out a place to hide my VCR/CD prono collection. If my gf finds it she would be absolutely horrified by my fetishes, but would finally understand why I dont pork her as much as she would like.

  5. #6 by detinennui32 on June 21, 2011 - 9:20 AM

    Damn right.

    Men, print out this post and memorize it. Quiz tomorrow.

    There are two reasons this is important. One: limiting access is good frame. There’s mystery, intrigue, and the unknown. Girls love the adventure of getting to know a guy, peeling back the onion layers one by one. And they want to be the ones doing the peeling. They don’t want you doing it for them. If you give it all up and put all the facts and emotions out there, there’s nothing left to find out, no adventure left for her. Boring.

    The flip side of this is: Maybe you two are not exclusive. Maybe she wants to be exclusive but you don’t. There’s no way you should be exclusive after one or three dates. None of it is any of her damn business.

    Two: She hasn’t earned the right to know everything and get so close so fast. This addresses how much you let her into your life and at what rate of speed. Many pre-red pill men, including myself, made the mistake of rushing into intimacy. By that I mean spending all my time with her, letting her into my life too much, telling her everything, letting her see, hear and know everything about my life.

    She hasn’t earned that right. She hasn’t shown herself worthy of that in a few days, weeks or months.

    While women hold the sex trump card, we men hold the investment and commitment card. And if you get too intimate too fast, you’ve played your one trump card, and you’ve now lost the hand. You’ve shown her everything you have, and you didn’t make her work for it, and you probably haven’t even gotten any sex yet.

    You’ve now given her ammunition to use against you. This might seem adversarial, but it’s true.

    Stay one step ahead of your woman. And don’t take an ounce of crap from her. She doesn’t have a right to snoop around where she hasn’t been invited.

    Never let a woman look at your phone without you right there. Even then it wouldn’t be a good idea.

    On Facebook, if you use it: Make your status as private as possible. If you’re a play the field multiple woman player, I would not friend any of your women on FB.

    As for fishing: spot on. Just make up something. You don’t have to tell her the truth. Not everybody needs to know all the truth all the time. And a girl you’ve been dating a few times certainly hasn’t earned the right

  6. #7 by detinennui32 on June 21, 2011 - 10:37 AM

    to know the details of your every conversation.

  7. #8 by bill on June 21, 2011 - 11:05 AM

    [“I was talking to my brother, he’s got a minor crisis with his youngster daughter”.
    This is a deflection onto another subject and bringing in kids will usually seize the woman’s attention.
    “Is everything alright?”
    Instead of constructing some stupid story (yeah, it’s a lie, sue me), simply deflect again.
    “It’s been resolved, he knows what he has to do.”
    Then change the subject back to her. Women love talking about themselves and their feelings]

    Clever – I was the type that would answer directly and not really get the meta aspect. Game blogs are really helping me understand not just women but life’s interactions better too.

    Bill

  8. #9 by superenigma on July 16, 2011 - 11:02 AM

    Do you not think that a line like “Damn right I had a good time, those two girls were insatiable” would disqualify you as a pathetic fantasist?

    • #10 by theprivateman on July 16, 2011 - 8:32 PM

      Not to an insecure woman who is snooping or fishing.

  9. #11 by Kat on March 5, 2012 - 1:52 PM

    I’d be furious if a man pulled the snooping and fishing game on me! It is no more his business early on than it would be my business! And to the guy worried about his porno collection I say leave it out! Get your freak on or find someone who will watch with you and is willing to participate. Be your own man and go after what you want!!

  10. #12 by Kat on March 5, 2012 - 1:55 PM

    Yes I am a female reader and I love this site! I am back in the dating world after escaping a horrible ltr. Curious about what men really want and desire to learn more about men so I can be a credit to the right one when I find him :-) Any sound, realistic advice appreciated!

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